Elderly Woman Makes Resolution to Replace “I Told You So” with “I’m Just Saying”

Long Island, NY—Friends of 83-year-old Dorothy Berringer gathered on a Tuesday to support her heartfelt resolution to become a better neighbor, grandmother, and mother to everyone she’s around. “She can be a bit much,” said neighbor Cathy Green, adding that she’s always jumping on any chance to say, “I told you so!” “Even when nothing goes wrong, Dorothy always feels the need to say that and make you feel like she knows what’s best and now I’m hearing that she’s turning over a new leaf—ha! I’ll believe it when I see it.” Dorothy told her supporters, “It’s true I may have pointed out each of your flaws and poor decisions in the past by saying I told you so, but that’s only because I love you and they were all very obvious to me. But from now on, I’ll be better and I’m making a resolution to no longer say, ‘I told you so.’ It will now be replaced with, ‘I’m just saying.’” It came as a shock to Dorothy that her supporters didn’t match her enthusiasm for this announcement as neighbor Barbara Bell replied, “it sounds like you’re not changing a bit—you’ll still be the same know-it-all you are today.” And in true Dorothy fashion, she responded saying, “well Barbara, I knew you wouldn’t get it. You don’t understand a thing about a thing, but I’m not going to say anything else because that would be impolite. I’m just saying.”